Talk to Steph

Talk To Steph: Is he too old for me?

I got this email from a reader recently and it mirrors what lots of people are passing through in their relationships. The question of age difference is a serious one affecting lots of relationships.

SL Fabz, read her story below and give some useful advice:

Hello Steph, I turned 23 last year October and before I went home for the holidays (I study abroad) I prayed fervently to God to let meet someone because I have been single for like 3yrs. So I got home and started interning because I was bored of staying at home and on this day after I closed from work, I met this guy who asked to give me a lift. Fast forward to two weeks later, we bonded so well and I was so into him. I think I liked him.

He loves me so much, at least that’s what he said, and told me he wanted something serious with me. I agreed and then he asked what my Genotype was because he always has a problem with that. I wasn’t too sure so I went for a Genotype Test and I was AA which means we were good to go. He was very excited. He introduced me to his Mum, Dad and only sister all within my summer holiday. I met each of them on separate occasions and they were very warm towards me (he’s the only son).

A month after we met, I let him and we made love. I was a virgin and that broke his heart because he wept. Before I was due to leave Nigeria in October,  he asked me several times to marry him but I felt it was too soon. We had been together for just 3MONTHS!! He’s everything I have always wanted in a man. He’s catholic, educated, matured, a good Christian from a good home and has a good job. But the thing is I’m 23 and he’s 36!! For some reason I think he is far older than me. What do you guys think. Is 13yrs too much? Should I go ahead and marry him?

SL Fabz, please give her some good advice in dealing with this situation.


*Remember, if you have a challenge in your relationship that you need advice for, please send an email to with the subject ‘Talk To Steph’

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