It’s a new year and just like lots of people, you might be planning to start a new relationship this year. This is a good thing, but ladies, before you get too attached to that man and find out he is not the one for you, there are some important questions you need to ask at the start of a relationship.
Here are 5 questions I think are truly important to ask:
1. Why do you choose me?
You might think that any lady asking this question is insecure about herself, but in this context, it is a question a confident woman should ask. This is not a question that is asked because you don’t feel you deserve to be chosen, but a question you should ask to know his reason. Why do you like me? Why are you attracted to me? What is it about me that made you ask me out? His answer to this question will tell you whether he want you just for a shallow reason or if his feelings run deep.
2. What are you looking for in a relationship?
Next, you should want to know what he really wants from you. This may strike some as too pointed but many ladies make the mistake of assuming a guy wants something serious when he doesn’t or that he just wants a fling when he is in for the long term. He might respond, “Fun and companionship. I’m not interested in anything serious right now” , or “I’m looking for someone who shares my values and wants to explore a future together.” This prepares you for the future.
3. What exactly happened in your last relationship?
Everybody has things they don’t want to talk about and that’s fine. Your last relationship is not one of those things that you can really hold onto yourself because it really affects your next relationship. That’s why you have to have this conversation at some point. You need to know if they were cheated on or cheated in their last relationship, which may be an indication of trust issues that may have developed. You need to know if they dated someone who was abusive or too submissive, or if perhaps this is their first ever relationship. Ask questions to avoid unpleasant surprises later on.
4. What kind of relationship do you have with God?
It is very important to know what type of person you are dealing with. He might seem to be the love of your life but he may be an atheist. You need to know where his spiritual life resides. You need to be sure that you both share some common ground and can build each other up spiritually.
5. What are your long-term goals?
Every man needs to have a plan and those plans should be different from the short-term goals. If they’re not different, then he’s not really planning. You need this information to decide whether you want to attach yourself to his plan and take the relationship to the next level. It’s very possible that you’ll like a man and his short term goals, but he doesn’t have a good vision for his future in the long term. This might not be the kind of person you want to attach yourself with for a long period of time.
This list doesn’t contain every single important question so I’d like you to help me out with some more. What important question(s) should a lady ask a man at the start of a relationship?
Tomorrow, we’ll discuss questions a single guy should ask a lady so watch out for that 💜