This is a model’s photo
Ann wrote:
I met a guy through a friend, no he actually saw my pics on a friend’s dp and he liked me, he collected my pin and we started chatting cos he stays far away in Abuja while I stay in Lagos. We chatted for a month on bbm and I told him we need to see cos we’ve dated for a month via phone…all this while on phone we talked about the future together and all and he seems so eager and ready. He finally came to Lagos so that we can meet after like a month and 2 weeks, he has since been around its been fun all the way and we actually clicked and bonded but recently after like a month of his stay I sensed he slowed down and when I asked why, he said our meeting is now a reality and that back then that we have not met things were different. He says nothing has changed the future together and all that we discussed when we have not met…but we need to take it slowly… I’m confused! Why the slowdown? Note: its now almost 3 months that we met on bbm. Please advice me.
SL Fabz, jump in and advice Ann
xoxo
#SL
36 Comments
Linda
March 20, 2013 at 4:12 amWhy the slowing down? Probably you are not wat he like or the other way round,his trying to make you his wife,daz some men that act like dat,thou you will feel it when ur husband comes around .
juliet
March 20, 2013 at 4:38 amI feel û shuld try 2 take it slow as well nd study his actions keenly.secondly try avioding d’aspect of sex nd if û 2 havnt had sex..as much as possible do NT venture in2 it…nd my dear,commit d’issue in prayers nd i definitely bliv God will direct û!
Rity
March 20, 2013 at 4:17 amMy dear just slow down too so dat u know what he’s up to.
Katie
March 20, 2013 at 4:21 amI seriously dnt see any prob in ur story dear. Its normal dat wen a guy has not seen or touched u, he tends to love hotter and better bt wen he does dat, he slows down. Its a normal tin, I tink he still wants u, just stay positive, neva act desperate, remain d sweet girl uve always being so dat his love and respect for u is not lost but above all, dnt forget to pray for ur relationship, men r like babies, dey want a lot of tins @ d same time, pray dat he focuses on U. Lastly, keep loving him and dnt act scared. Xoxo.
Adams
March 20, 2013 at 4:34 amY you are not wat he like or the other way round,his trying to make you his wife,daz some men that act like dat,thou you will feel it when ur husband comes around .
christabel
March 20, 2013 at 4:47 amBabe, d guy culd just be a player nd maybe he is done with u but doesn’t wanna tell ya yet. On d other hand he culd just wanna let things unfold by themselves. Maybe he. Doesn’t wanna rush things wit u so dat u guys wouldn’t regret or break up later in life. If I may ask y d rush? It culd also be he is not ready for dat yet, some guys re like dat. They tell u one fin now but they hv a different fin in mind. Plz be careful.
adesuwa
March 20, 2013 at 4:52 amhey girl, u should be thanking ur God he came out openly.some dated for yrs d guy pretent to be in love and girl believe. my dear ann clean ur tears.(#)tht is for u after rain comes sunshine.CIAO
Ewy
March 20, 2013 at 4:59 amDo you feel u’ve known all of him after just 3 months? People can have characters that are like a bulb of onion soooo many deep layers. So babe, pls be logical don’t be like a desperate person. Calm down and see why he wants to take it slow.
sly
March 20, 2013 at 5:03 amYes the reality is begining to set in cos marriage is not the same as dating. you too have to pray and seek God”s face to ensure that he is your own hubby. God’s ways are far different to that of men.
yomola
March 20, 2013 at 5:13 amMy own opinion is dat, maybe yu ar nt up to wat he expected and besides yu shldnt av waited 4 so long b4 yu guys met. I think yu shld give him a space and watch his attitude, do not force yur self on him, leave him to decide.
dorcas
March 20, 2013 at 5:29 amJust be careful,watch him closely,maybe he really isn’t the one for you
christiana ishaya
March 20, 2013 at 5:38 amOk, like seriously, I see nothing wrong with d “slowing down stuff, take it easy don’t rush into something that u will regret later, if u rush into marriage, u will definetely rush out, if he’s ur man, it shall come to pass, wish u all d best girlfrnd.
nicky
March 20, 2013 at 6:30 amI think u should take your time and watch him clossely,and see what happence,if he changes completly then u let him go,cause u guys are not ment 4 each other,don’t fell 2 bad,cause ur own man will come 2 u.
inimfon
March 20, 2013 at 6:41 am3 month is not 2 long or short, use ur head
bolanle
March 20, 2013 at 7:46 amDear Ann, dis guy has a surprise 4 u which is either; to gladen ur art or break it. Some men are jst created 2 break precious arts. Bt there’s an assurance I ve: No one shall want her mate…Is 34 vs 16
ify nelson-udeh
March 20, 2013 at 8:09 amLet him be and move on with your life. May be there are some qualities in you which he can not handle, but I tell you, if he is for you, he will be back ie, if he will still meet you there.
ify nelson-udeh
March 20, 2013 at 8:18 amI drink water every morning and I make sure I take like 8 cups of water every day and since I started this, b*o*y….! I been loving ny skin
precious chidinma mbachu
March 20, 2013 at 8:39 amTo me I don’t think he still has full interset in u anymore. What he saw wen came initally was not what he xpected bt he try to play along with u maybe for awhile n now he is aving a rethink abt u. Bt be calm,shine ur eyes n put ur ears to d ground u will find out more. Guys u never can tell.
susan onyenachi peters
March 20, 2013 at 8:40 amYes dear you have to slow down like the guy said, so that you both won’t end up making mistakes.
kech
March 20, 2013 at 9:15 amI understand hw u feeling buh u need to wake up n tell ur self d truth. U barely knw dis guy. U dnt even knw if he is married or if he has a problem health wise. Dnt jump into any relationship in a hurry . Always pray b4 u get into any relationship n ask d holy spirit to direct u. Remain blessed!
Janet
March 20, 2013 at 9:40 amyes there is a need for it so give it a chance there is no need for rush, slow down and ask urself some vital Qs? u need 2 slow down.
folayan rasool
March 20, 2013 at 10:18 amWhen a man says he wants to slow down, he wants to not hurt your feelings ,so he can walk away hopefully minimize the pain you feel. Men’s brains don’t work the same as a woman …hopefully you didn’t have sex with him because a man will think how many men has she met like this….while you’re thinking you want to spend the rest of your life with him . If you haven’t don’t let go of your panties if you didn’t already and he will show you who he is…..good luck!
seraphina
March 20, 2013 at 10:30 amTake it slow Ann, remember u just met dis person, try knowing him more. Marriage is not somfin u rush in cos if u do there is every probability u rush out.
Arame
March 20, 2013 at 10:59 amYou can discuss things with him again. Try not to get upset while discussing or force him to give a precise reason.
Just express that you have noticed a change in him and it is not helping the relationship. Ask him what is bothering him and try to make him open up. For all you know, you may not be the direct reason his attitude changed.
If still he can’t give you anything to hold on to, then you have to try considering the fact that he might be a player. A player naturally cools off when there is nothing more to discover about their new partner (and mostly this is physical/sexual).
Ijebuflorida
March 20, 2013 at 12:28 pmCome on to Florida, you will find your husband.
Eviliciouspepe
March 22, 2013 at 12:44 pmAre they men in Florida? Lol
agatha
March 20, 2013 at 1:18 pmMy dear u have to face facts here.let’s stop avoiding the conclusion of the issue at hand.who ever is deeply inlove and crazy about u,don’t just wake up one morning and ask for a slow down.when he’s supose to be luking forwards to spending more time with you.he saw your pix,asked to get your,called you,pinged wwith you for months,even went forward to meet you in person,spent time with you,hagged out with you,ad now he’s asking a slow down?plssssss.he’s done with the r/ship.Girl I think you should be grateful to God dat it came this early than its late.imagine you went out for a year and he asks for a slowdown,what will you in dat instance?.pls I advice you move on with your life and pray and hope for a better and God sent to your life.Also if by any chance you scarred him off with your character,I advise you make amends.take care dearie and know that a slow down is not the end of life.it might be an open door to a great r/ship ahead.
Lianeyhood
March 20, 2013 at 4:47 pmComputer love the said! If the guy have already seen ur pantie,girlfren forqet about marriage..for slow down simply means call for quit. the guy is a flirt?
Chikondi Kapito
March 21, 2013 at 2:13 pmMayb he wants 2 give u enuf time 2 know each other take it as an opurtunity 2 get 2 know him aswell.Y the rush anyway u still have the rest of ur lives 2getha.My advice is dat u shud agree 2 take it slow,take it 1 dy at a time.
Gud luck Ann & dnt 4get 2 include God in ur r/ship.
max
March 21, 2013 at 5:11 pmyou have just known him for 3 months, though you have discussed the future togeda it does not mean that whatever this future is it will happen immediately (it can). there is still so much of each other to know and explore. You need to really really know this person and let him know you too, if you feel there is anything you may not be able to live with or handle in the future you guys discussed its better to part ways, no one can change a human being.
I do hope you have not slept with him as most guys feel ur easy that way and want to move on to the next thing, if you have however, God help you. try and take it slow with him and talk to him so you can find out what he really means and deal with it early( if it means breaking up or continuing the r/ship). Also learn the lessons you need to learn so you do not make the same mistake again in any other r/ship.
note that you both have to be honest and if you do not want the same things let it go, it would be hard but let it go .
All the best
anin
March 21, 2013 at 6:07 pmi tink u re 2 fast Ann , chat with a guy 4 just 1 month plus n u want 2 settle down with him, spend d rest of ur lyfe with him , someone u don’t even know his background, tins don’t wok dat way. u may b taking a great risk. u nid more tme dan that b\4 u trust n giv ur sef 2 smeone
Grace
March 22, 2013 at 6:41 amAnn rely u r too fast. Bt it has been done, wat u ll do nw, is try to 4get abt him, he is nt for u no mater hw u try eccept u won go use juju..
cathy
March 22, 2013 at 4:41 amWhen a guy says you should slow down, he is trying to end the relationship without wanting to like put it in your face. Get with it dear
owen
March 26, 2013 at 10:05 am‘Relax!!! Take it slow!’ Ann ure too special to be treated dis way. Let me give a secret, dump him b4 he does so he’ll always want u for life. Uve to bcos ur instinct is showing u d red light, pls babe i did it and im happier for it. Loose d battle and win the war. Gudluck %
jia
June 9, 2013 at 4:45 amBe confident and careless no desperation prove him as though you are a strong woman even if you are not he may have some one besides u and wants to tag you along. do not settle for less
slimdove
August 1, 2014 at 4:58 pmjst put is it in prayer gal….