Give some good advice and win recharge cards!

Vivian

My Dear Bummi…. If he feels this way and you guys know you want to take your relationship to the next level then let him take the plunge…He cant keep you without and guarantee and yet expect you to forfeit your scholarship. Any man who loves u will always want the best for you. If he doesn’t ask you to marry him the PLEASE take your scholarship ok…Im happy for you

Collins

Dear Bunmi, you will need to sit down and ask yourself,what do i want most now,marriage or education.Then you can be able to make your choice,the two choices before you are very sensitive and making the wrong one can ruin your joy for life.For me,i would ask you to choose staying put and face your good relationship,acquiring degrees can wait but a good man doesn’t wait and its hard to come by,but if your mind is set to get your degree first,try and sit your man down and tell him your mind,if he is really your missing rib,he would approve your move and wait for you.The most important thing is for you to make yourself happy with what suits you and no one knows that more than you,your parents view should be put into account too because they matter.

Akinloluwa

You have to be very cautious here. Though your scholarship is just as important as your marriage, you also have to consider him. He’s also 35 and time is not on he’s side too-he’s getting older you know. The basis for your going in for the scholarship is to make money right?! And if he’s ready and willing to take good, proper and affectionate care of you, why bother about a lousy scholarship. You can always get that. And remember, a GOOD MAN IS HARD TO FIND.

David

Parents should train their girls how to live and survive as a woman , rather than wait for a man to fall on. My candid advice! Sit him down, and explain why you need the degree most, as it would make U a better person in all ramifications. If he disagrees, Go ahead with ur career, if he’s ur man definitely things would work out!

YEYEAREWA

My dear, u had better focus on your career or end up regretting for the rest of your life. I know it seems like a very had decision to take right now! But if Nnamdi really loves u and has your best interest at heart, he will let u go abroad and pursue ur dream. I’ll also use this medium to tell other girls- Neva let a man destroy ur lyf! It myt b hard 2 get ova d man u luv, buh u’ll neva knw until u try,

Judith Abiri

Dear bumml I feel u should stay back and be with your man whom u love whole heartedly.what is education abroad when u can get one here.besides if u leave him and travel out and along the line he leaves u for another u will be heart broken thereby not focusing on ur studies.also tk note ur mum has also advised u on it don’t u think ur mum will definetly not lead u astray candid advise to u is sit him down to talk about it .if he insist u stay back pls do .true love is hard to find these days.most men don’t appreciate distance relattionship .I wish u the best in all u do.

Maraizu Uchechi

hello Bunmi, ur story is quite a big one.
Ur fiance shuld knw dt scholarship is relevant to u and would make u a better person. If he loves u as u claim, he shld be able to support u through thick and thin. I believe if he were to be d one to get such an an opportunity he wudnt even blink, the least he wud do is to convince u.

We all knw the woman is alwys @ the receivin end in every situation; gud or bad. So u’d v to tread wif care n patience.

This issue requires prayers and understandin4rm both ur mum and ur fiance….

It’s not really easy 4 him to let u go…every man in love wuld act ds way….

Wat both of u need is to sit down n tlk through ds and reach a consencus….a beautiful relationship is based on effective communication and mutual understanding…

On ur part…if he finally agrees, wch i pray he does…u must make sure u dnt disappoint him, ur family, n ursef; cos u claim to love him in sincerity… Cos u knw wat dt means..hmmm?

I pray 4 u, 4 divine wisdom…

Much love….!

kate

I think u shd follow ur heart, bt dis is my advice to u, if u love him dat much u shd be able to let go of dat schorlarship abroad study in ur country and keep ur man, distant relationship is very diff dis days.

Dike judith chinwe

Mydear, if he truely loves u , he should get married to u cos 2yr is enough to have known u. Ur career is ur future nd u have to grow together with it. Talk to ur mum to see reasons with u nd above all pray. Only God knows how ur future will be. Thanks

Sochima Madubueze

I think you should go for your scholarship because if the two of you are really destined together by God then you can be able to overcome anything that will break you people apart no matter the distance.

Tobi Adepoju

Bunmi, i know that to u,he’s the perfect man. but if he truely loves you, he would be happy for you first of all.i understand that hes scared of long distance relationship but he should consider you and your career. before you make any decision,talk to him and let him know how u feel about your career and the opportunities of travelling out to study. U guys should be able to work it out.

vivian chisom

I would I advice you talk about your career as a lady than this come to think of it its a scholarship hmmm mehn he should arrange for your marriage because I won’t lose an opportunity to become great to a mere relationship if he is your husband its different he is still ur bf so chose your career we fall in love everyday and we meet great and nice people everyday don’t make any mistake about it

Jesse

Dear bunmi
just invite him and have a heart to heart discussion with him cos communication is key to any happy marriage or union

Nanna

Dear Bunmi, since you are sure of the love and you guys are compatible, I suggest you stay back and listen to your man bcos obedience to your fiancé is part of the etiquettes in sustaining a good relationship and believe me distance relationship doesn’t mks it stronger! Besides, you can always further after marriage.

Ernestina Madufor

Dear Bunmi, first of all, I want u to know that love consist of faith, trust, sacrifice and many more..
If Nnamdi truely love u, he should be able to endure 4yrs of ur absence knowing u are just a phone call away. He should be able to accept that this is ur dream, ur future and wot makes u happy and should be able to support u all de way. That is love, unselfish and understanding.
Again dear Bunmi, take this from me cos I speak from experience, if u stay back without pursuing this education, my dear, few yrs from now, u will hate urself and above all Nnamdi!! Yes, certain circumstances in future will make u look back and regret ur actions. It can cause undue strain btwn u and Nnamdi yrs later.
Finally, follow ur heart Bunmi, do wot is right for u, 4yrs on… If Nnamdi is truely urs, then he will be waiting wn u come back. Thanks.

sylvia

Hello Bunmi, you said Nnamdi is very comfortable, he loves you very much and he’s 35 years old, so what’s stopping him from marrying you? He can marry you and you’ll still go for your studies abroad, people do it, its no big deal. Though being in a long-distance relationship can be very difficult, but you can make it work by talking to each other everyday, make sure you know how he’s feeling and vice versa. Try to be romantic and to keep things interesting. My dear, if he doesn’t marry you before the due date of your scholarship…PLEASE take your scholarship, opportunity comes but once. I can assure you’ll meet a guy like Nnamdi or even better than him. I wish you the best

Hannah Ohiremen

Bunmi,you should have it at the back of your mind that these days ‘good husbands’ are hard to come by.It will be a thing of joy taking the scholarship but is it worth your relationship with Nnamdi?ℓ̊’d sincerely advice you try reaching an agreement with Nnamdi about setting up a large business for you here in Nigeria,that way you still get to become an enterpreneur.Please,act wisely and don’t destroy your relationship afterall,you can’t marry your certificate.

chioma triciakiel

If I have a scholarship to study abroad,,babe I will not look back, Nnamdi can wait if he truly loves u or both of u can travel together and start a new life. Golden opportunity doesn’t come twice.

charles

Since is abroad issues and scholarship that means u cnt be deported,just trý explain with understandin then if he cnt wait for u then leave him bcos opportunitý comes bt once and good things they say doesn’t finish.so just be made first then any other things follows bt if u refuse this opportunity u and nnamdi can seperate someday and u wil have ur self to blame.Always be wise

Adedeji adebisi

Bunmi u av 2 thnk hard 4ist b4 u cn take anybody advise nd let m tel u sumtin c marriage is simple when u step in2 it with al it takes bt difficult when u rush into it without knowin wat it takes dnt go bunmi it 2 mch wat do u xpect of ur husband 2 do at om let m tel u if u go u wil loose ur husband nd u say he carin c anoder opportunity wil cum dnt loose ur marriage cos of a smal tin

ify mokwunye

Going through the story,I noticed she used the word “may” never find a man like him again. It’s a very hard decision to make but it’s at times like these that we choose between a career life and a homely life. It’s not really clear what level of education you’ve attained but if it’s secondary you’re with;I’ll advice you go for the scholarship. Whatever is truly yours will find it’s way to you whether long or short distance. Go girl!

Udokwu Izuchukwu

My dear, if you have gotten your first degree, i advice you stay back if at all he is planning to marry you, but if you don’t have any degree yet, go for it, you can still find a better person.But most of all trust your instinct and follow your heart.

Bietnaan Longbaam

My dear I want to ask u this question, if u give up ur education for ur relationship and he breaks ur heart will u have any regrets? And if u sit him down and explain how important ur education is to u, how it fufills u n he still doesn’t understand can u love him still? The best things in life carry the most risk and sacrifice, nobody can tell u which decision to take because deep inside of u u know which will make u haPpy all u need do is take that risk and live wit it, don’t regret whatever decision u make! Its about ur happnieSs not ur mother, not ur father, not ur husband urs, sometimes we nEed to be a little selfish and be happy!

Peter dike

My dear freind, the best advice i can give u is, since your fiance is dear for all your needs, and you both love each order, then you should accept his offer because if you don’t you will lose him forever. So go with him then later he will sponsor you to achieve ur dreams in a near by intitution, whereby he can be with you rite bunmi an u both can achieve your dreams . Dont make same mistake other couples make pls. Bye 4 now

Akekunle Akeem

She needs to take the bull by the horn. This is her career. If the guy leaves her she can get another man that is more better than him. Gone are the days that wives wait for the husband before she can meet all her needs. Its a fifty fifty things

pius francisca

I realy desire such a schorlarship and so u shouldn’t miss it, and I think ur fiance has some fears not just that he doesn’t want you to grab such a great opportunity so find out what his fears are and fight it together with him and sincerely promise him your love; for there is nothing as beautiful as a man and woman truly in love.

Glory

Dear, if he truly loves u , he will wait 4 u. Ur career is ur future nd u have to grow together with it. Talk to ur mum to see reasons with u nd above all pray 2 ur God, present this case to Him, he knows d best 4 u. After talking 2 ur God, den follow ur heart because if u follow ur heart u will not make a mistake. God bless u.

ABU zekeri

Hmmmmm! Sure a dilemma and critical indeed, but life is an opportunity which is either forgone or cost. So bunmi, is hard though but to me since you contented with all he does and he can fed and truly care for you babe! You can still win his heart later after you have settle down and by the of God he will be the one to even sponsor your dream career. And remember that what you have that is every woman dream so think wise and put it in prayer let the lord do his will..!think you

awele

A woman’s greatest achievement is her family.U may find this lame bt its the blunt truth.Career will always be there,schooling could come later bt finding love is a rare gift.U may achieve all ur career dreams bt never find true love again.Pls i would advise u keep ur studies on hold,reason with him and he agree with u bt if he doesnt,pls stick with ur man.U still have alot ahead of u.AWELE

Joan Taylor

Hi Bunmi,

Go after your dreams, the sky is the limit. Do not allow anyone to stand in your way. Men will comes and go, opportunity only knock once. There will be more men after Nnamdi and better one who will treat and respect you the same way he does. I am a shame of your mother who tells you to put your dreams a side because it’s not going to make Nnamdi happy, what about your happiness. Nnamdi should be the one who encourages you to go after your dreams. If Nnamdi really loves you he should support your dreams and aspiration. As a mother of three I am going to give you the same advise I give to my own daughters, which one is of your age, first, ask yourself, what would you be and then do what you have to do, Bunmi, go get your education you are only 25 years old, if and when you are finish accomplishing your goals and dreams, and Nnamdi still around you can marry him, if not, bigger and better fishes are in the ocean. Follow your dreams. Here is a quotes of inspiration I hope they will help make your decision a little easier and I quotes “Happy are those who dream, dream and are ready to pay the price to make them come true” Leon J. Suenes

Good Luck

emmanuella

My dear if ur guy really love u , let him go to ur parent house and do some necessary things like paying ur dowry. So dat u can stick together forever, also he travel with u if he can’t stay without u. My dear education is d first thing in life, u hv d opporunity to study abroad pls go for it.

cynthia

Hmmm…a tough one, I must say….Bunmi, you are 25 n he’s 35. By the time you re done with your studies, you will be 30 and he will be 40. To be away from someone that u love n loves u in return for 5yrs isn’t easy…5yrs is not 5weeks or 5months, anything can happen. But from your story, I know travelling for ur studies will really make u happy n u don’t think u sld miss d opportunity….My advice: If Nnamdi is not yet ready to take you to d altar, then go for your studies, he’s 35 n not 21, I mean he’s old n man enough to make dat move n u said uve bin engaged for 2yrs. How long do u wanna wear dat engagement ring before the real thing is done? Now Bunmi d big advice is dis, u don’t have to walk up to Nnamdi n say marry me or I will go for my studies…NO. Just have a soft but serious dialogue with him n from his responses, u should know if he’s ready to settle or is still waiting for the rite time….if he sincerely luvs u n is ready to marry u ASAP, then marry him cos if u were married to him n dis opportunity came, u wldnt think of travelling…u wld stay….so Bunmi…all d best.

lizzy

Hi Bumy, seriously U̶̲̥̅̊ need Gods devine intervention. Spend some time with God and let his angels lead U̶̲̥̅̊ on what to do. Every1 is saying thesame thing here which one W̶̲̥̅̊ȋ̊ƪƪ U̶̲̥̅̊ pik.humanly speaking i W̶̲̥̅̊ȋ̊ƪƪ tell U̶̲̥̅̊ to go for ur studies its very important if that man is urs, U̶̲̥̅̊ guys W̶̲̥̅̊ȋ̊ƪƪ b together. He W̶̲̥̅̊ȋ̊ƪƪ respect U̶̲̥̅̊ more with that certificate because U̶̲̥̅̊ wont have to depend on him for all ur needs in future even if he has the capability to take care of U̶̲̥̅̊, well talk to your God, only him has b best answer to this question.

Benie Ajos

Dear,wisdom is always profitable.This scholarship is a rare opportunity you may never get again.I know you guys love yourselves,but your dream can’t be ignored as well your love for Him.If he feels so insecure and against distant relationship then you guys could get married asap;after which you go for your study.Assuring him of spending quality time together during holidays. Love is all about sacrifice,but for good reasons for a better future.

emmanuel

Girl,the best thing for you is to go for the scholarship.if really its true love he has for you he will wait.the scholarship is important than any man or anything.keep that in mind.the heart aslo can Decieve you.be careful and choose wisely

Bunmi Sylvia

Dear bummy,it is gud 2 av som1dat luvs u and understandable but if he lovs u truelly.
He wil allow u to go since he’s not enemy of progress but if he stil insist pls quit d relationship and proceed.

mama dav

This is a very tricky situation. Sincere he is not opposing you been a career woman I suggest that you find a school here in Nigeria that you can pursue your aspiration and still allows you keep your relationship. In relationship we sometimes compromise or sacrifice to make it work. Remember you are an African woman and here there is no respect for single women no matter how successful they are. Talk to him and dont be selfish about this since you said he has been very good to you. But dont sacrifice your future by not pursuing your desired carear, just compromise the location. He may even allow you do the same cause after some years of marriage. So just apply wisdom and it is well with you…

okpara,ndubueze

hi Bunmi,frm d look of things.u seems 2 av a very gud fiance,since he has been dia 4u al dis wile,i think u stil need 2 tlk 2 him concerning dis golden oportunity u r abt 2 grab,dat u r nt going dia 4 eternity,cos i believe dat if u guys r made 2 be,definitely it wl n nt even ur prograne croad wl wl hinder it,dn’t alow dis golfn oportunity 2 slip off u,neva u alow ur self 2 end up as a house wid ok,open ur eyes n grab ur dreams,thnk u.

francess

Nnamdi can change his mind anytym.No one knws 2mao,God 4bids!,wat if he dies in d first year of ur marriage? U̶̲̥̅̊ would hv passd on a once in a lifetym opportunity.if he Ȋ̝̊̅§ d one 4 U̶̲̥̅̊,God wil keep him 4 U̶̲̥̅̊.if he luvs U̶̲̥̅̊,he wil support U̶̲̥̅̊,cos its ultimately 4 his own good.pls take d scholarship.

Lola

Education is good but you also have to look at pressing situations like age. He is 35 and will be 40 when you are thruogh with the course and likewise you will be 30. He may have plans of marrying earlier than 40.
Who told you that you won’t be the one to leave him alone if you go for the course and find someone else. My dear, 5 years is a real lot and things will change.
Married people still go for higher degrees. Sort out your marital life before you start finding yourself unmarried and desperate.
Take your question to the most high God and he will answer you. Thank you and wishing you the best.

Stephen Tayo

Much as i wudnt wnt Bunmi 2 lose on both side i wud suggest she consult a genuine Clergyman/ woman 4 spiritual counseling nd guidance. Why bcos d spiritual controls d physical.. Dis is d best u can get.. Trust me!

Martin

Bunmi… This situation presents you with a tough choice but then who says you really have to make a choice? Can’t the system be manipulated? Well I’d say you could defer your admission for a year and within that time you both get married. He does not want a distance relationship so I’d suggest you both relocate to the US as a couple. It might involve him making a huge sacrifice but I know in the end you both will be better off for it. So while your admission is deferred get married and start processing your visas together. Now I say this because while I wouldn’t want you to lose Nnamdi since you both seem so in love, I do not think you’d be doing yourself any good by forfeiting a lifetime opportunity to pursue your dream. When you get to the height of your chosen career both of you will be very proud of your achievement and grateful at the same time that you made the right choice

itohan

My darlin sista, there is a purpose 4 everything dats happenin, opinion(1) pray to God for direction (2) pray to God to show u if he is d right man 4 u, (3) education is more important and a scholarship 4 dat matter. If he is rightfully urs, he will let u go or even wait 4 u no mata d yrs or he can come ove to see u once in a while. Pray hard n be wise, don’t let ur situation be “HAD I KNOW” abt d scholarship yrs later. God will see u thru.

adebisi ademola

Dear Bunmi,this case need God’s intervention and guidance, if i were you i will deffer my admission for a year to see if Nnamdi and i can get married then work on relocating with my family abroad on study grounds or better still subscribe for an online program. if this options are not possible then i propose you settle down first as you can always get that admission anytime with no age barrier but age can be a barrier in marriage. moreover you may not concentrate on your studies if you have a divided attention. so get focused, settle down, and hope to study later possibly online or any Nigeria institution. i wish you the best pls invite me to your marriage soon.

Osmond Eze

Bunmi
The situation appears dicey and precarious but objectively and with the benefit of foresight,it is a simple case.Capacity building/enhancement in this information driven age far out weighs emotional and superficial attachment.don’t get me wrong.Love is not self seeking rather,it places others first and above self.Relationship/marriage breaks and sacrificing your academics for this marriage is not a guarantee that you would be happy in it; but knowledge acquired lasts a lifetime and imparts more on our personality.If I love you,I should be happy to see or make you grow and become better than I met you and would never be threatened by your academic prowess and achievement or distance and time.Marriage does not necessarily confer security but education does and we should look beyond what we see today because it is ephemeral and so,you need to widen your horizon and this can only be through education.Though this marriage is important going by your words but your degree for me is far more important so that you don’t ended up as a house wife.This is to avoid despondency later in your marriage which might to lead to complications and the unexpected.Without thinking twice,I urge you to proceed with your studies and you will be glad you did.Age is but number and cannot count against you when it comes to relationship.Good luck.

ivy

I think that you should seek God first and He will surely direct you.However, if you are very certain that Nnamdi is the husband God has designed for you,I suggest that you humble your self and submit to him,cos one thing is for sure if God wills for you to further your studies,he will cause Nnamdi to support you.It may not be now but eventually.

So my dear, get ready to start making huge compromises in marriage,this is just the very first.

Ulunma Idimah

Dear Bunmi, God said in the book of psalms “My word is a lamb to your feet and a light to guild your path” involve him in making your decision. If you truely love Nnamdi and you are engaged to him, you have to convince him the more but if he says no don’t exchange your joy for a degree. He takes care of you and you are happy with him then make your home in him because he can do that for you. He can decide to send you there at his convinence, it is hard to find a caring and loving man. This is a trying moment but you can win with wisdom. Remember, wisdom they said is better than strength. He might decide to even let you go if you give up.

Tolulope

As much as the home is important, it will be happy when you are relevant. The degree is one of the things that will make you relevant so please pursue it now when you still can. You will need that degree in future and nnamdi will not be able to provide it and it would have been too late. Follow your dreams now when you still can. If nnamdi loves you, he will support you in becoming the woman of your dreams. Tkia.

Sunday Adex

All I believe in is Love, if he truly love her, he must allow her to pursue her career. Education is most impportant

shedrach

pls bunmi follow your heart.if he loves you as he claims he will understand you and support you.i advise you go for the scholarship cos its your future not his.he will understand if he dosent then he is not Gods man for you.there are so many men that are better than him out there.he is just jealous and afraid that you will leave him when you get there.or better still make yourselves a promise not to leave each other.this is a life time opportunity dont miss it because of a man that is not your husband yet.good luck

Diane Davis

Dear Bunmi,

I will sincerely advice that U follow ur dream & go with ur schorlarship, remember u have been in this courtship for 2yrs & to a man who u say satisfy u with evrything, so what kept u this long in courtship? If he Ȋ̝̊̅‎​ƨ̣̇ truely what he is u guys shuld have been planning marriage now. Also what makes u think you will get married in 4yrs? I advice u just pursue your dream,Ȋ̝̊̅‎​ was ones in A̶̲̥̅ cicurmstance like this Ȋ̝̊̅‎​ pursue M̶̲̥̅γ̲̣̣̥ dream & today i Ǻ♍ married to A̶̲̥̅ bettter man than the one I thought is the best. Bunmi trust me when Ȋ̝̊̅‎​ say go to school & if your man did not wait there is a better one out there for you. Remember all things work together for good & I Ǻ♍ talking to you base on experiance.

OLADAYO

bunmi dis life is a risk,talk to him convince him as a lady let him no you are for him. u guys can even go to court and do court married for him to be sure of u during ur holiday time u can come home for a visit,my dear true love is hard to get u just need to convince him

Ebuka Okoye

My Dear, Bunmi, my sincere advice to you is just to follow your Heart. You knows your dream, we have our different dreams and perspectives in life. I don’t see this as a big case, because if there is high understanding and mutuality between you two, this not gonna be a trouble.

Please kindly pray to the Almighty, for his divine direction

Regards

Samuel Chinwe Worlu

First of all, I would want you erase the false impression of not getting some like him anymore; it is not true at all… Also I believe a distance relationship is not a too much challenge and will definitely become closer if the love you share with each other is true, selfless, and strong, that is, you guys have been together for a long while.
Now, since the scholarship is something good you have always wanted and he truly supports your dreams and aspirations, which will be beneficial for you guys thereafter, I believe He should trust you enough to let you go do your studies. The bible says true love has no fear in it. All he needs is trust and believe God for you while you are away. More so, once there is a strong communication link while you are away, the ‘love-bond’ will still be mutual and strong. In the same vein, you can also decide to visit from time to time to keep the relationship alive. Prayers can also absolutely help make your decision mutual; tell your plight to God through prayers, and He will sure cause lines to fall on pleasant places for you – He knows the best for you.
However, If your finace bluntly refuses to succumb to your scholarship study abroad, am afraid you might have to let him go if he sole desires to leave. Education opportunity like the one you mentioned is rare and should be embraced and maximized.
God will always bring the right people into your life, but you have to be wise enough to let people walk away if they only seek their own desire and won’t let you pursue and achieve your aspirations. This is my humble, harmless advice. All the best. Cheers.

Dabi

Dearie ur drive and passion for education is laudable and very admirable especially in a time like this when most girls think only of marrying a succesful husband and nothing more. I should say though that education is an opportunity that abounds forever and its access gets easier with time whereas true love “might” come just once in a lifetime. Love is a sacrifice and now urs is being tested. The decision is ultimately yours but weigh what u might lose and gain and whichever outweighs is your answer… Goodluck

vera omoike

Dear bummi It is jst so unfortunate dat tins is moving dis way but 1 tin u must kwn is dat nt all d tym dat u must hv ur way.u are an abitous lady and i like u 4 dat but u must be vry careful with d kind of discuss dat u make.if u claim u luv him and u are vy sure he want 2 marry u y not pay some sacrifics see greater luv cast away all fears he is ok financial y don’t u mak an agreement with him dat he see dat he trains u in skull here in nigeria 2 d level u want..I beleive he will agree as long as u are giving up all becos of him.if u travel u will be d 1 2 loss wat is education 2 a woman wen she doesn’t hv a good man by her side?

chika

please my sister, if you know both of you realy love each other, forget the degree and get married to nnamdi, education is good but your happiness in life is most important, GOD is the head of christ, christ is the head of church and man, while man is the head of woman, woman is a supporter to man, so if nnamdi is there for you and family just as GOD is there for his loyal servant then why are you afraid,only put GOD first in your live and pray that nothing should make you or him to change. if you will like please read this following bible passage, proverbs 31v 10-31, ephesians 4v26-32, ephesians 5v14-33 and 6v1- 4, hebrews13- 4, 1corinthans 7v 10- 16. read and also give to nnamdi.
thank good lucky.

uka perpetua uzoaku

Bunmi
There is something about love and that is if u love someone u wud be willing to accept compromise. Degree gives fulfilment and not happiness but love makes you fill fulfilled nd happy at the same time.
U can decide 2 let go of this opportunity nd get this degree n nigeria, that way u dnt loose anytin or anyone. Remember there is no age limit 4 education, so u can decide 2 let go of dis opportunity now nd do it n d future or u get ur degree n Nigeria nd be close to the best tin nd best part of ur life

martina

For me, i think if Nnnamdi truly loves and trust Bunmi he would want to support her dreams and aspirations. if he is scared of loosing her, they can get married before she travel abroad. they can also plan on visiting each other since the guy is well to do and I’m sure Bunmi will definitely have some holiday periods during the period of her study. until they are able to come up with alternative way that Bummi can actualize her dreams, she shouldn’t forfeit d scholarship

mimi

Hi bunmi,
D’true nature of luv is givin nd sacrifice..God is an example of wat true luv is all about…4 God so luv d’world dat he “gave” his “only” begotten son…he sacrificed Jesus for u nd i.
If u truly claim u luv ur man…den dis may b d’sacrifice u hv to pay for dat luv!
Let go d’scholarship…who kwns ,ur man may see dis selfless act of luv nd change his mind…u neva can tell!

chinwe

You need to be able to stand on your own. Education is very important. You are a help mate not a dependent.

Go for your education, marriage will always come. If he is for you he will want you to progress and have your best interest at heart. Before you make any decision always picture yourself 5years later and see if you will be happy with it.

Assume you are a manager in a multinational company and you are transferred out of the country will he advice you to quit or go ahead?

chetachi uzodimma

My dear,i have to give you this adivce that if the guy have started paying your bride price that you should forget about the scholarship as for now maybe after your marrage and you think you still wants to further your education than u can face your career but if at all he has not do any thing, 1 my daer i will advice you to further your education and you should also tell him that if he truely loves you that he should wait for you, And consider your age ok. Take care

shade olorunyomi

My dear, i’ll want you to look at this issue from two perspectives-that Nnamdi has been good all these years doesnt mean he’ll continue to be good, humans do change. you could decide to forgo your scholarship programme 4 his sake and still u people may not end up as husband and wife. he could change his mind, u could change yours, his attitude might change, just anything could happen that would stop u two from been married to one another. so i would not want u to base ur decision on the fact that u took watever step u took based on d fact that your relationship looks like its heading towards marriage. it may or may not. secondly i want u to know that true love is all about giving – giving ur self totally to someone else, your all, nothing is too big 4 u to give to someone u truly love. see Bunmi if u truly love this guy u would be willing to let go of watever scholarship just to be with the one u love. true love is about giving ur best to someone else. true love will make u look 4 other ways u can still be whom u want 2 be, wat u want to achieve without risking loosing the one u dearly love. my dear if am to advise u, i’ll want u to forfeit the scholarship programme, if and only if u truly love Nnamdi and please expect nothing in return even marriage, so even if u end up not marrying him, u’ll still be glad that u gave something so dear to u 2 someone u truly love. but my dear if u are uncertain about the love u have 4 him, if u cant convince urself that u truly love him, please dear start packing your bags and making arrangements to take up the scholarship bcos if u stay and even get married to him and the love isnt that true love, my dear i doubt if u’ll ever be happy with him 4 making u loose such a golden opportunity of a life time. one thing i know 4 sure is – if it is true love nothing would be too much or too big to give up 4 the one u truly love.

adeola

My word to u is 1. certainly he doesn’t belief in distance relationship or marriage, he will certainly change when u leave.
2. am sure u r not a virgin neither is he so there is slight chance that u can cheat n he could too.
3. your father is d head of d house as well a man he knows what men can become of in later years which ur mother can not deny.
4. d love n care that u get in relationship should not b expected in marriage if not u wil have bp.
5.my advice to u is if u can cope with all d scenarios have painted to u make a choice.

Salisu Ibukun

Nothing is 100% certain on earth,everything is all about probabilities and taking risks,but a risk is worth taking if it has more than a 50% chance of bringing forth success.
I would now ask you(Bunmi) some questions which i don’t really need answers to,you only need to search your mind and answer either YES or NO to yourself.
If your YES is more than No,you can go for the scholarship,and if otherwise,i would advice you to stay.
The questions are as follows.
1.Do you love yourself more than you love him?

2.Can you cope without seeing him for 5 years?

3.Are you ready to get married at 25 without having a job of yours?

4.Is the reactions from both parental sides positive about your going?

5.Do you believe in long distance relationship?

Thank you.

King Jerry

Hello Bunmi, there are some vital questions that need be ask. For example, what are his plans to further your education and his plans towards the marriage? However, you should not give up your fiancé neither should you give up your education. I believe his love for you should instigate his happiness towards your education in other to bring out the true values and potentials in you to realise your dreams aspirations as a woman.

You going abroad to study should not stop any marriage plans as well, since it’s a scholarship and is a one time opportunity to be happy about which would definitely save you cost. If you both are truly in love then I believe distance should not be a problem. According to you his main concerned is the distance, I believe since his comfortable financially, you could both come up with some kind of arrangement to travel to see each other all through your studies (maybe during holidays and short breaks), which would definitely help and trust me you won’t fell the distance over the course of your studies.

I believe this situation is to test the strength of your Love for each other. Please don’t let each other down and also do remember,

“Distance never separates two hearts that really care.”
“Love knows not distance; it hath no continent; its eyes are for the stars.”
“In true love the smallest distance is too great, and the greatest distance can be bridged.”
“True love doesn’t mean being inseparable; it means being separated and nothing changes.”

I wish you all the best in resolving this situation with your fiancé. Best wishes.

Please guys, do check out my new blog and follow, it would really mean a lot to me. Thanks.
http://educatenaijastudents.blogspot.co.uk/

oluchi iwuala

Hi bunmi,the situation needs Ɣ☺Ʋ †• Put your priorities right.in ♍Ɣ own opinion education is good likewise getting married.Ɣ☺Ʋ and nnamdi should work this out hence if Ɣ☺Ʋ Α̲̅я̩̥̊ε̲̣̣̣̥ sure he wants †• Marry Ɣ☺Ʋ then ask him †• Do the marriage rites and then do a court wedding,by this he could be able †• Come over for visits pendinh when Ɣ☺Ʋ finish and come back.and if he refuses †• Do the marriage rites which gives him a claim on Ɣ☺Ʋ ,I advise Ɣ☺Ʋ carry on with your scholarship programme.

chiamaka

Dear bunmi, my cousin was in this exact dilemma about two years ago.her fiance will not hear of it since he wanted them to get married in about a year.what did she do? she fasted & prayed about the situation asking God to turn her fiance into encouraging her to go for the scholarship if the scholarship was God’s will for her as she has waited for this offer as if her life depended on it. my dear,it pleased God and this same fiance(now husband)turned around to start circulating the news that his fiancee got a scholarship in one of the ivy-league schools. my dear,it was the answer to her prayers o,there is nothing sincere fervent prayers cant do o.Bunmi go to God in prayers let his will manifest . i wish you the best dear.

Wale Adebayo

Take your love life serious,because you do not expect a man of 35 years to still wait for another 4 years before starting his own family,for you not to lose him to another lady that is ready.

Ugo

Hello Bunmi,

I must confess that you are truely at crossed roads right now and i quite feel your mixed feeling of joy, pain, anxiety and yet confussion. Let me be short and Precise.

First, irrespective of your religious background, please pray about it. pray for divine guidance and counsel only God can halp you through this without hassles.

Secondly, We all have dreams and i truely respect your dreams. I believe your Man should as well. on the second hand, Love would always excel and bring one to true happinness. But a confused heart might never see the good in Love or about Love. Love is Patient and Love understands all. It is patient and it is a strong bedrock for all round success. Your Man and Yourself should find a middle ground. If you truely both live eachother, Love would always find a way. It is easy to say go for your dreams or Stay with your Man. What if it was me? LOL! Both of you should be open and have a talk, you need to make your Man understand the joy in going for your dream and also make him understand that you wouldnt want to live him or without him. If your Man Loves you for real he should appreciate and encourage you on your dreams. If you loose your dream, you might never be happy in your marriage no matter what. but if you loose your Man because he failed to understand, then to me thats a red flag on his part for choosing not to understand. who says you cant find one who would appreciate your dreams and Love you even more for it. Both of you should talk about it. But if despite all, he chooses not to understand the importance of your dream to the relationship that both of you have, then please painfully take that walk. else if he chooses to understand and supports you, my dear even in the distance Love would always prevail. Whats the distance between Heaven and the Earth? so far i guess, but yet God’s love is never seperated from us. He can choose to relocate with you, He can choose to come see you often, Both of you could get married ( Thats if you both agree after the talk) and if it is true love, even in the distance, both of you would never get carried away. Though i know its not going to be an easy one. But Trust me, Love like nothing other,irrespective of the distance, would always fid her way Home.

Jen

Move on with your scholarship programme if Nnamdi is urs, he will wait and if he is not urs then he will go.

ether samuel

Dear,d fact diz its a cômplicate issue,u must stick to one,distance doesnt matter.,all dat matters is love,if d guy really loves u lyk u think then u he must accept and respect ur feelings,coz diz is 21century no woman wil ever want to be a house wife..

Ifeoma

My dear,I advise you to pray about this very seriously,then go for the course if the man is meant for you he will definitely wait for you.I dont think its wise for a woman in this time and age to solely depend on a man no matter how comfortable the man is.when you are educated and maybe earn your own money you gain extra respect and admiration from your man.Education is very important and cannot be traded for anything.What if eventually you dont pursue ur education and he dumps you,you will have two things to lose but if you go for your education and lose him.you will still get married to a very wonderful person who will respect you for the strides you have achieved in life.So pls dear,pursue your dreams and education.They are the most important things you should strive to achieve now not marriage or man.This is my humble advice.

Ejiro

Hello Bunmi, Firstly I want to say a big Congratulations on your scholarship. To d matter on hand,my dear u must understand that love is trust,love is sacrifice,love is selfless. If Nnamdi truly loves u,then he will have no issues letting you accept this offer cos like u said its a ddream come true for u. Remember ure just 25.would u want to forfeit this dream becos of Nnamdi and in d next 5 years,look back regretfully on opportunities lost?I would advice dat if he truly wants to marry you,he can do it before u leave.it dosent av to be something big,it can be something small and cute.(A small tradditional marriage wit a court wedding). Both of u can sit down and work out a good plan on visitations and the rest.Thank God he is comfortable. If he dosent agree to this,then u av to move on with ur life.follow ur heart and pursue ur dreams. His refusal to this,shows a bit of insecurity on his part and you seriously do not need this. Don’t let anyone tell u that without Nnamdi u can’t move on or live a normal life. Ur partner/fiance is meant to help u achieve urr goals,pull out ur potentials,support u while u fly and not stop it or suppress it. You may end up with bitterness if u forfeit ur scholarship. Most importantly,shut out d voices around u and ask urself,what does God want mi to do?when u av dat answer and do it,then ure on d right path.God bless u.

TOnia

I advise you take your scholarship and go study, men will always be there, it might not seem so now but your future is most Important. If he truly loves you he will wait. Please listen to your dad.

philip

dear bunmi. Love cover’s all tins. To succeed in life u must pay some sacrifice. N if u meet d 1 u luv n life n u c dat is a perfect match. If u lose him, it is possible dat in d next 10year u might nt c such person again. Since dis guy hav morethan enough den wat else do u need. Pls tink vry well. Tnx

Debbie

I think you should weigh the two and choose the most important one. Scholarship is a rare thing but marriage is a life time but you are not sure of your future wit him.so go for your scholarship and so that you will be sure of your future.goodluck wit making your choice.

Dairo kemmy.

Dear Bummi, dis is ur life & future, I would advice u 2 go 4ur scholarship,fineee d guy luvs & cares 4 u 2day but u dnt knw wat 2moro will become also men re not reliable & u can’t depend on him 4ever. See ehn if he truly luvs u as u said,he will luv everytin dat will make u happy. U said ur Dad was d only 1 dat agreed wit u abt d scholarship, he agreed bcos he’s a man & he knows wat his fellow men can do,so pls go 4 ur career,if he truly luv u once again, he will wait 4 u & u can as well go 2 registry.

chioma chukwuelobe

Bunmi,this is dilemma. So my advice to you is to try and talk to him.to persuade him to allow you go for the scholarship programme. We as women know how to talk to our men. Asides that also convincing your mum to support you and if she does, ask her to talk to nnamdis mum so she can convince her son that this is the best move and that with love, care and understanding it wont affect ur relationship. But in a case he bluntly refuses you going, jilting your affair shouldnt be an option because as you said he is a good person and good people are scarce. D way you mentioned him that means deep within you you know he can take care of you and with your current education status am sure you should be able to take care of yourself. U wont lose either ways. But whatever decision you make if you feel hes the one, make a decision that wont end your relationship.

LINA .N. UGEMUGEH

I THINK YOU SHOULD PRAY TO GOD FOR DIVINE WISDOM TO TACKLE A SERIOUS ISSUE LIKE THIS BECOS BOTH ARE IMPORTANT N U DNT WANT TO MISS THEM.WEN GOD INTERVENE,ITS D BEST SO JUST GO TO GOD IN PRAYERS.(DIVINE WISDOM)

eyebee

Well its my first time commenting here…buh I must say that this issue is sensitive. Good Marriage isbeautiful as much as education is important.. Approach with caution. Well my advice to u is: talk with ur dad n have him talk with nnamdi I’m sure he would listen if he’s a wise man..upon dat basis u guys can now make plans on how to survive the entire period. Ur mum might not b the best person to give u advice becos she may b biased by d fact that nnamdis mom is her friend..remember u need to b happy before u can make him happy..a happy wife makes a happy home…u need to also b prepared to make sacrifices..cos its gonna b a long road! Good luck gurl

pattyclues

A bird at hand is worth a million outside, if its not broken don’t fix it, you want this scholarship because you want more knowlege in your field to enable you get a good career and hence make good money for family and live happily, but if you are sure this boy loves you and you are happy with him, why do you want to throw it away to start searching for this same happiness again

ty

Bunmi based on ur write up,U̶̲̥̅̊ dnt want to lose dis guy nor d scholarship.my advise is that U̶̲̥̅̊ shud tel ur fiance to formalise ur marriage den U̶̲̥̅̊ get admission here in d country.U̶̲̥̅̊ said he’s rich,dat means he can sponsor ur education either here or abroad,finance is not a problem.my dear,no mata d certificate U̶̲̥̅̊ have,it can’t buy U̶̲̥̅̊ husband n a bird at hand worth more dan millions in d bush.U̶̲̥̅̊ ve known dis guy for two year n knows wot he’s capable of doing.have ur education in a place Where U̶̲̥̅̊ can see him meaning U̶̲̥̅̊ kill two birds with one stone n be happy.a lot of rich sisters A̶̲̥̅̊я̲̣̥ε̲̣̣̣̥ out there praying for bro,regretting ova there past action.girl,wise up n be hapi.gudluck

SCILLA

My dear sister, my question/advise goes thus, U claimed this guy loved u so much since u met him & has been very supportive to “ur needs/ dreams needs”
If he truely he love u as claimed, Y has he not marry u by now or dose he want to date u for ever?
A genue relationship is that one that help each othe fulfil dreams, vision and purpose in respective of whatever challenges been it distance or what may, will stand my ur side.
My sisterly,friendly and spiritual advice for u is to pursue your education which will not only make u as a woman of substance but an international achiever which will stand u out to be useful, valuable , unique, happy, successful for urself, family, society and nation wordwide.And a woman whom every genue successful man will want as mother of his children, wife, sister and mother .
Once again, countinue to ur scholarshipe programme abroad. If he truelly love u, this is the time he need to show it my marrying u, encourage u to proceed ur trainning.
May God Almighty give u divine direction that will not lead u to regrets in Jesusu name.

chelsea

my dear dont loose d two side at d same time oppurtunity dey say comes ones if he loves u then u guys can tie d knot,and u can futher ur education here,if not plz go 4 d scholarship

Sandra Omoregbee

Dear Bumi, my advice is this; if you are very sure about Nnamdi then you should forget about the scholarship and start thinking of getting settled. Every girls prayer is to settle with a successful man that will take care of her and her kids and now that you have one , are you willing to take chances? And you know what that means. You are 25yrs old n to me I think that’s a perfect age for a girl to settle down. And you should know that when a girl starts craving for educational career, she goes on and on and before she knows it she’s not thinking of marriage anymore or if even she is, she starts having difficulty in getting suitors and I must advice that our African men are not crazy about women who has several degrees and is so busy with work and have less time for their family. From the little education u have acquired you can get a job that pays well and stick to your man so you 2 can start up a family and have bonny children. I believe God will create another opportunity 4 u if u have faith and dat time will be more convinient for both of you. Jst have faith. If u loose dis opportunity of being with ur one true love becos of sm career thing I bet u won’t forgive urself. Be wise in making ur decisions!

henrietta

You need to play king solomon here by being very wise. Your scholarship will not wait for you but your man can if truely he loves you. Every man will want the best for the woman he truely loves. You’re already engaged. Why not get married before going to study? That way you’ll have both to yourself. Afterall, he’s financially buoyant and old enough to get married. Do not risk leaving this scholarship because you’re engaged to a man. If he leaves you tomorrow, how will you fend for yourself? Depending totally on a man has never been the best. May God help u Choose wisely, Bunmi.

olamide

Think you should go ahead and take your scholarship offer. If he truly loves you he will trust you enuough to come back to him after you round up your programme.w

Kanyinsola Adaeze

HI Bunmi, first of all i wish to congratulate you on your engagement and ur scholarship. You are indeed lucky to have such at a tender age.
Now to the matter at hand, you should always seek God’s face in anytin u wish to do especially in situations like dis wher u dont kno which part to tread. I understand ow ur fiance feels cuz we’ve heard and seen situations where long distance relationship/marriage crumbled due to so many issues. At d same time, we’ve seen situations wherby it worked. Nw wat worked for one may not work for another. Education is a gud tin esp in dis modern day & time bt der r som certain tinz education cant fufil. Getting married to a good man is every woman’s dream as it signifies fulfilment dat the highest educational qualification can neva attain. its true love is patient and it requires sacrifice bt it shud also not be taken for granted. My candid advice is first invite God to show u which part to take and den search within ursef abt wat exactly u want nw. the education or the marriage? also note dat on d educational aspect, u can get quality education right here in Nigeria, mayb u shud consider dat one also. Bt u shud also put in mind dat if u were in ur fiance’s shoes, which do u av prefered he picks? am nt askin u to pick him over ur education bt dat u shud consider al d advantages as against d disadvantages befor takin any decision. Am sure, God almighty wil help u make ur decisions right. I wish u d best of luck

Doris

My dear Bunmi, If he truly loves you and trust you this scholarship should not be a problem between you too. Kindly, explain to him and convince him why you truly need this scholarship and what you stand to benefit for the both of you. You cannot depend on him forever because no one knows what the future holds. You love him so much and so do your family so talk to him and make him see reasons with you and believe me everything will be alright

Nkiru

Dear Bunmi,
I will advice you better take the scholarship and finish your studies, this is an opportunity that might not come your way again. lt is a better way of preparing and securing your future.Your fiancee can wait if he is truly yours, he can equally visit you from time to time over there there since he’s doing well financially.. Pray as well and follow your heart, dont be deceived by anything or anybody, you know what you want and what is good for you. Convince you fiancee to allow you go for the course and give him reasons why it is important. Whatever will be yours will sure be yours. Good luck!

Aminat

this is really a tough one dear bunmi…let’s look at it this way, u are more or less left wit the option of choosing btw ur education and fiancee…if u dont go now will such an oppourtunity come ur way again? if u leave ur fiancee will u meet someone like him again? are u willing to let go of ur man cos of ur education? these are some of the questions u shud ask ursef sincerely…do u love him enough to forfeit d education or the education to forfeit him…truth is no one can make d decision that will affect ur life except U not even ur parents and fiancee…and for evry decision u make dere is always an alternative to either one u didnt choose…my sincere advice is that you talk to ur creator to order ur steps to do d best for u n ur future (fiancee and education), talk to ur man n u both come to a decision that will benefit u two…most importantly in wateva decision u make may it be d best dat u’ll eva make n hope it wont cause u any regret later in life…wish u d very best.

cassidy peters

though it’s a hard decision 2 make bt 4 me it’s beter u settle down if dat ‘ll please ur man. 4 wat ‘ll it profit u wen u get all d deegrees n lose ur happiness as woman? Dis is a man u nw know like ur cuorse u studied in school, u know wat dose n dose nt please him n he has lived up2 ur espectation wat els do u nid, am nt saying he’s d best bt he’s defrent 4rm d rest. love’s all abt sacrifise, let go ur deegree 4 d joy ur relationship wit dis guy has brought 4 d familise n d love u’ve 4 him if u truly love him. May Gog giv u d grace 2 handle dis in JESUS NAME AMEN……

chicwtprettyface

I’ll ask u to get married to ur man 1st before leaving if he’s scared u’ll live him for another man, let him move with you temporarily till ur course is finished, this may even be a getaway u both need to get close to each other after d wedding, if he’s a biz man, he can be shuttling btw wherever his biz is and ur school destination and if he works all his breaks ad holidays wl be wt u,its just a temporary thing and before u know it, d course is over, remember once opportunity lost can never be regained, and this is ur future and career we r talking about, if u marry him and n 2yrs he starts getting funny what wl u do and ur scholarship is gone, marriage is good and ur future shd be taken care off as well!

chynell

My dear Bummi, I prefer you get married. A 25yr old isn’t a baby.
First of all, I guess u remember you are a Nigerian and age matters when it comes to marriage(not everyone gets lucky). our men go for people they can atleast be in charge of and not some sophisticated chik that wouldn’t respect him.
I guess you must have run a course here in Naija or even if you’v not, make your man start up something for you.
SOME EXPECTATIONS ARE NEVER MET.
But on the other hand if you can marry him and still go for studies…that’d be kul… Just PRAY

Bisayo

First lesson in a every relationship: love yourself and your partner equally i.e 100%. Your career is your degree, if truly he loves you like you claim, he will wait. Tell him respectively, use this as a yard stick to know how much he is willing to sacrifice for you. You can’t afford to be a full house wife, waiting for your man before you could a thing. Think about it.

Goody nechy

My dear, getting a scholarship overseas at that is really a good thing however you’ve already found a man that really cares about you. A man you even testified to have all you need in man.
I belive he loves you and have your best interests at heart, he’s just a little insecure and somehow afraid of loosing you. If its really necessary that you take the scholarship, i’l advise you to have a heart to heart talk with especially when he’s in good mood. Earn his confidence and trust that no matter where you are, you’ll stil be loyal. Reassure him of your undying love for him. And most especially create a persuasive arguement in a sweet way for the necessity of the scholarship. You can even get him to read books or be talked to by people that know better..(that is if travelling abroad is of utmost important and that you are not just going there for fun thing).
if after all this he refused to oblige with a reasonable point. Then i advise you let go of the scholarship. Doing that would even endear him more to you and who knows he might be moved to make other better plans for you..better opportunities will stil come your way once there’s life..take it easy dearie

precious

My dear Bumi. All i need to tell u is that if truly he loves and cherish you. for now he may not be happy with the idea. but he will wait on you to go and come back. education is the key to success. If you are able to get this degree. you will also help him in life. My advise is that go ahead with your scholarship. If he loves you he will wait 4 you. And if Truly both of you are main to be Man and Woman. ordained by God. He must surely wait. But go ahead with your scholarship.

Damilola

Dear Bunmi,
Congrats on having the best of both worlds. Your Man and Education. They are both important parts of your life. Should u forfeit your education and stick to your relationship? should you stick to your relationship and forfeit your scholarship? I don’t think either would be a smart move. Why not eat your cake and have it. Get admission here in Nigeria and settle down with the man of your dreams. Who says studying abroad is the criteria for a good career? In life, Happiness is what truly matters in the long run. Believe me i know this first hand.Life is better with a good partner beside you to support and encourage you.Pray for wisdom to make the right decision. All the best in your endeavors.

Dami.

Ugonwa

my dear Bunmi, pursue ur education without looking back….there are better men out there and i adivce that u do not marry him because you intend to go abroad for further studies…d best man is yet to come ur way….u said u had always wanted a scholarship, now that u have it, u want to shut down ur life becos of a man that may fail u tomorrow and then you start bitting ur fingers and start saying had i known? Yes u love him, but education first. God loves u!

Kharimah

Dear Bunmi, first and foremost, call on God to give you the wisdom and directions on this issue for we are mere mortals, we only know about the present, we don’t know about the future. As a human, i think Distance shouldn’t really be a problem if 2 hearts = 1,with trust and communication that is if you guys really love yurslvs as yu claim, and the fact that yur Mother tinks that staying with Nnamdi and Forfeiting yur scholarship is the right choice well, this is about you, your Happiness, not yur Mother’s besydz opportunities they say, come but once. Many are out there looking for this golden opportunity but the couldn’t get it. It isn’t because yur are prettier, richer or more valuable than them that yu got it. God has a plan for yu, nd if yu rily want to pursue yur education, Go,do it.if Nnamdi really loves he should be happy for and ready to support yu besydz i personally believe in destiny…that what will be will be..if yu both are meant for each other, sumhw, sumday, yu both will be joined together.

Lizzy

Well bunmi I read ur story twice nd I saw the question at d end of ur story asking that should u travel nd get ur degree or stay nd raise a family with nnamdi… From wat I saw nd ow I interpreted it is simply dat if u leave nd get ur degree then its sure urself nd nnamdi are parting ways which means u r closing a very perfect chapter of ur life nd on the other hand if you leave ur degree and get married to nnamdi then u won’t forgive urself for taking such a decision even if u r happy with the marriage nd u mite even see urself as a liability to ur husband. So my advice for you is that u firstly pray seriously over this issue, secondly ve a discussion with him first nd then invite both families(parents) to sit nd talk ova it nd make them see reasons why u really need dat degree(by this time I’m pretty sure there will be a brighter side to the problem) cuz I know no man wants his wife to be a liability to him, and thirdly if he still insists i think you should look for a schl in nigeria cuz I know there are nice schls here(thank god he is comfortable so he can foot the bills) so u dnt ve to loose anything I.e u have ur education and ur relationship at the same time. I hope my advice helps u a lot. Nd do write back so we can know the outcome. Till then have a worry free life…. LiZzY

etim john

most people are in our lifes to kill our dreams and aspirations. he isnt ur life n dont always think u cant fine ur perfect match if he decides to leave u 2day because of ur dreams n aspirations.Hence,if he truely loves u,let him accept ur dreams n aspiration,n help u achieve them.so,go for ur education,ur knowledge is ur wealth.

D2h Videocon

Hi Dear Bumni. Your article writing way is very appreciative. I really like your way.second thing is you should stay with your fiance and get your degree. Because this kind of scholarship are come and go but you will never this kind of man again. Rest final decision is up to you.

Fortune

He says he loves u, he has shown it over time and most importantly u believe he loves you. That whay you are so worried nd find it difficult to make up your mind and find yourself in a delimma. The question is what’s the guarantee that things will always remain the way they are right now. What if he changes his attitude, his mind or his behaviour tomorrow, you wake up to the realisation that you can no longer cope and you want out of the relationship or he marries you and you begin to see parts of him you never knew existed and they aren’t exactly as pretty and you realise that it would have been better if you had something of your own doing. What if you finally come to realise that your life would have been better if you had decided to take the chance of studying to fulfill your dreams.

I think its funny that we ladies can choose to forgo our dreams and desires for the interests of our loved ones, yet they often times find it difficult to do the same for us. What stops his love from giving you the opportunity to study and waiting. SOme say out of sight out of mind and others out of sight makes the heart grow fonder. For your case depending on what you decide, time will tell.

From my personal experiences, I can say you may come to regret not taking this opportunity to develop yourself. People no matter how good can change or dissappoint you when you least expect it. People over time have shown that they can change only God cannot change. They can stab you in the back when you least expect it.

Talk to him, get him to see reasons why you really need to take advantage of this opportunity. It will be for the best eventually. Make him understand that if its you you’ll support him in the pursuit of his dreams even if you are worried about how it will affect your relationship. Persuade him if it is important to you.

I think that the primary question. How important is this scholarship and educational experience to you? Do you think it will be in your best interests, because it is you who will have to live with the effects of your decsion. So at the end of the day. Pray, listen to what your spirit says and seek God’s face. This way you can be rest assured that your decision is the best for you

amala E

Dear bummi, every bdy hv said it all bt jst wnt 2 say u suld talk 2 God in prayers. Nd if truly nnamdi is ur man he should allow u 2 go, becos ur future counts nd most importantly he loves u or is dis 2 much 2 ask? I believe NO.

Laura

My dear Bumni dis really a tough one, but my advice is,,Go for the scholarship,if u guys are destined to be together distance can’t stop it…if he really Love u he should support u coz Love is all about support,,encouragement and trust…if he’s really ur man he will get married to u now or wait for u 2 return…but if his not ur man Believe me God will give u someone much better than him….still seek God to order ur step,,,,all the best.

dela ahiakpa ira

i agreed with fortune’s comment

Eviliciouspepe

The only advice I can give you is to seek God’s face in this situation. He is the only one that can lead you in the right path, He is the only one that can give you direction when you are confused. He alone knows tomorrow and what your future holds. Pray about it, seek Him and tell Him what you want and He will reveal to you if that’s the best decision to make. Truly it’s only God that can help you. Seek God so you won’t make a mistake that will be detrimental to your future (whether its pursuing ur education or pleasing your fiancé).

faith Anie

But then pray heard not to make mistake. Let him understand why you have to go.

Kristina B

Dear Bunmi,
Please don’t let this apportunity pass you by, take the scholarship and live your educational dream. Gone are the days women are mostly stay-home mums, now we hv women as heads of Fortune 500 companies and I know from reading ur post u have big dreams and aspirations. Please don’t let them go to waste simply because ur fiance(not even ur husband yet) has ask u not to. I just hope u don’t later regret ur actions not to go abroad for ur studies and then hate Nnamdi for the rest of ur life. I strongly believe Nnamdi has some iota of fear and insecurity in him. He’s 35yrs old and time is no longer on his side, he must hv done the math and notice that he’ll be clocking 40 by the time u’re done with your studies and probably doesn’t want to wait that long. And then there’s also this issue of most Nigerian men being intimidated by the educational qualifications and exposure of their spouses. Just like others hv rightly stated here, if God forbid ur marriage doesn’t work out guess what? You’ll be the one at the loosing end. Bunmi, imagine if reverse were the case, u really think he’ll pass that great offer? I honestly doubt it! A real man supports the dreams of his woman simply because at the end both will be the beneficiary of the outcome of that dream!

Akanji Emmanuel

what shall it profect u if u loss ur husband and ur education, cos there is something u must know that no matter the love, feeling and all other things u both have for each other if GOD says that is not ur man, he is not. if he really love u to the fullnest he should be the happest man on earth cos no man or woman want to marry someone who can no represent in any where so cis i would advice you to go for ur education and if he loves u let him support u and give u al the encouragment u need. GOD help u, gud luck

Ademoyo's Entertainment

sweetheart, pursue your dreams…If he is the right guy for you , he will support you.
You trust him..why not get married and you both relocate for your course.
i think the issue here is u’ve got the money …u guys are comfortable,,,u can hook up with the deal later in life…trust me ,the less privilege will go study and be somebody and her guy will be VERY supportive…
opportunity comes but once.

mine

If Nnmadi really loves you he should allow you go ahead and fulfil your dream. We are in an IT world now where you two can be communication through different means (The only thing that you may not be getting regularlly is sex if you’re both already involved sexually). Assure him of your love for him. Let him know you’re passionate about him and your career. Never say never (Nnamdi is the kind of man I may never meet again). “We meet to part & we part to meet”. Go ahead & fulfill your dream (This scholarship is something I’ve always wanted), if he really loves you he will wait, cos the years you will be together after your school will be longer than the years you’ll be spending in school, so you still have many years ahead of you to stay together. If you dont go now the 5yrs will come & go. GO GIRL!!!
IF HE WANTS YOU, NOTHING YOU DO CAN MAKE HIM LEAVE, AND IF HE DOESN’T WANT YOU, THERE’S NOTHING YOU DO THAT WILL MAKE HIM STAY.

sandra

Bunmi,
a man that loves you will always have your best interests at heart. if you know that undertaking that course would boost you in life,then by all means make him understand that by talking to him. don’t jump into anything until u have had a meaningful and deep converstaion with him regarding this issue.you should make him see reasons with you,make him understand that this is something you are passionate about.if he cares,he will listen and you too will come up with alternative ways of keeping ur relationship moving strong.he is probably hesistating because of the number of years u ll invest in your education,but make him see that what u get to gain will be worth the sacrifice of time.u can always come down to Nigeria to see him during the holidays or if he has the means he can travel to see you as well.u two can get married in the process,and still work it out.i hope this helps.

Miriam

My dear Bunmi if he really loves u, he will allow u to go afterall is for both of u. Talk to him, plead wit him and try to do court marriage before u make any move ok. In all pray to God before discussing the issue again with him. His heart is in the hand of God, he will melt it ok. God bless u.

Alao Emmanuella

bumi, if he really loves you, he will wait for you or better still manage a distance relationship untill you round up and come back to settle for good. your degree is very important to enable you support him as his help mate. cheers