Blog Talk to Steph

Talk To Steph – Everlasting Postponement

 

Hafsat wrote:

My name is Hafsat, I am 29 years old. I don’t even know how to start my story. I met this man 2 years back, he proposed to marry me and I agreed; we did the introduction and fixed a wedding date for Nov last year few weeks to the date, he came up with an excuse of not having sufficient money to get married in Nov we postponed to the tail end of Dec . He came up with the same excuse, we shifted ground till Feb all the while I kept telling him  that it’s not all about money we have done virtually all the necessary things we can go ahead and finalize , he said no. We fixed another date in March then to April again just one week to the day he called to say he needed 3 more weeks to get ready, he keeps postponing, pls advise me, what should I do?

TGIF SL Fabz, what do you have to say to Hafsat?

xoxo

#SL

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15 Comments

  • Reply
    chin
    April 26, 2013 at 3:56 am

    Trust me girl that man doesn’t really wanna marry you if he did he would not have so many excuses so kick his ass to the curb!!!!!!!

  • Reply
    jennifer sambo
    April 26, 2013 at 4:21 am

    My dear. Take a walk nd live him. I know its going to be hard,difficult nd painful buh trust me its the best for you. Its obvious he doesn’t want to marry you again.you know this kind of last minute decisions. I dnt want to start tinking that maybe he has found another girl dats better dan you.or somtin like dat.so its better you live him now than push him and then when u eventually marry, instead of enjoying the marriage,you will be enduring it…..

  • Reply
    funmi
    April 26, 2013 at 4:40 am

    Have a heart to heart discussion with him about it and if he is still giving you thesame response, have someone he respects and listens to ask him what the problem is. I mean if he has like a mentor or something. If all else fails, my dear na prayer ohhhhh. The guy just might have seen someone else. Leave his sorry behind as soon as possible. End of story!

  • Reply
    Rithney Conteh
    April 26, 2013 at 4:51 am

    Hey Hafsat. There are many ways to say *no* He is just playing around with you, he want you but not for any serious relationship. wait for the three weeks again and proved me wrong.

  • Reply
    claire
    April 26, 2013 at 4:54 am

    Sit him down nd have a real heart to heart chat with him. Ask him what really is the problem, if he wnts to go ahead or not with the marriage…..if truly money is the issue then suggest u settle for a low-key marriage & avoid unneccessary Expenses but if its not money, the earlier he tells u his stand the better. Don’t force the marriage its a life+time commitment that should be enjoyed not endured. Goodluck

  • Reply
    ijeoma
    April 26, 2013 at 5:01 am

    Would advice u have a heart to heart talk with him.also take time to study him to. Understand what actually is wrong and d situation.u should know his intention and plan and work with it,I wouldn’t advice u think negative.maybe it isn’t that bad

  • Reply
    faith
    April 26, 2013 at 5:28 am

    Go for delivance and wait until d next pospond month comes

  • Reply
    Catherine
    April 26, 2013 at 5:40 am

    I’ll advise you wait till dis 3weeks and see, if he postpones it again den sit him down and ask him wat d real problem is, watch his eyes when he is speaking cos d eyes always carries d truth dey always want to hide. If it happens dat he doesn’t av a tangible answer,I’d advice u to move on bt dnt let him knw ure moving on. Just open ur heart to new opportunities den gradually reduce ur contact n communication with him. All d best dear.

  • Reply
    precious chidinma mbachu
    April 26, 2013 at 6:54 am

    Daz funny hw can a guy propose marriage do all d necessary things n all of a sudden refuse to finalize it hmmmm MEN. I will say he is no longer interested bt don’t kw hw to tell u abt it so he is trying to use frustration to make u say u quit by urself. I advise u pray ernestly for God’ intervention.

  • Reply
    rookey
    April 26, 2013 at 8:12 am

    It’s not really easy to advise on issues like this. I’ll say if u know your man very well, you should be able to tell if he’s postponing for a genuine reason or the postponements are as a result of him bn irresponsible. Once you’re able to place his actions under the right platform u’ll know the next step to take.

  • Reply
    rose
    April 26, 2013 at 8:27 am

    Go to the marriage registry to get married. He doesn’t need much for that. If he refuses, then you should know that there is more to his postponement than meets the eye.

  • Reply
    Eugenia
    April 26, 2013 at 9:34 am

    Hafsat, i think u should move on wit ur life. this is man tricky…

  • Reply
    may
    April 26, 2013 at 10:28 am

    there is something he is hiding from u. Go to God for revelation. Den give him an ultimatum

  • Reply
    VIKY
    April 26, 2013 at 1:53 pm

    HOLA,YO PIENSO QUE NO TE QUIERE TANTO COMO PARA CASARSE,O,O,TIENE ALGUN IMPEDIMENTO PARA CASARSE,DIME ¿COMO ES CONTIGO?¿CARIÑOSO,DISTANTE,AUSENTE?NO SE ,YO LO PLANTARIA,LO DEJARIA,TANTOS DESPLANTES NO SON LOGICOS,PIENSA,QUE SI TE QUIERE NO HACE FALTA TENER UNA FORTUNA,LA GENTE SE CASA TODOS LOS DIAS,SIN SER RICOS.PIENSA EN ALEJARTE UNA TEMPORADA,DILE QUE SE LO PIENSE,QUE TU LO VAS A RECONSIDERAR TAMBIEN.(DE FALTA DE UN NOVIO NADIE SE MUERE)MUCHA SUERTE,UN SALUDO DESDE ESPAÑA. VIKY.

  • Reply
    Nneka
    May 6, 2013 at 4:06 pm

    U should know his kind of person by now, is he the type dat don’t take marriage serious,find out if is ur idea of dis marriage nt his so u will nt make a mistake,marriage is a commitment n should be enjoy.

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