This mail was sent in by a StephanieDaily reader. Let’s give some good advice to help her out of this difficult situation.
Before I got married, I have heard stories of married women having issues and fights with their mother-in-laws but I always thought mine would be different. While my husband and I were dating, she was always very nice to me and didn’t give me any reason to think we would have any issues.
But things changed a few months after my marriage. As soon as she noticed I was pregnant, she started imposing things on me. She said I must go to her church, eat the kind of food she wants me to eat, dress in a certain way and more. To make things worse, she lives just a stone throw from our house and spent many nights in my house under the pretence that she was taking care of me (as if I was sick) or that her house was too boring.
When I put to bed, she finally moved in to our house and hasn’t moved out ever since (it’s almost two years now). Before you start to think I’m being ungrateful about her concern, let me tell you a few annoying things she does. She eavesdrops on conversations I have with my husband (I’ve caught her more than a few times); she tells me often that I can’t cook in front of my husband (he doesn’t have a problem with my cooking) and even removed a plate of food I once gave to him saying it was bad for his health. When I was searching for a school for my son, she gave my husband multiple reasons why he shouldn’t choose any of the schools I liked until we eventually enrolled him in a school of her choice.
My husband dotes on her and tells me to be patient because his Dad is late, but her presence in my home is getting more and more annoying. I am not free to do things my way anymore, I am losing my self esteem and a big rift has been formed between me and my husband because of her presence. But she sees nothing wrong with this and is not prepared to leave my home.
I need your advice. What can I do?
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7 Comments
Bolatito
January 9, 2014 at 6:24 pmI feel your pain, dear. I have been in a similar situation before. It was only God who removed her from my home. You need to communicate with your husband properly about this. He is the only one that can remove your mother in law from your home.
Someone who cares
January 9, 2014 at 8:28 pmMy dear, you are not alone! God almighty will see you through this trail. A lot of marriages have been broken through the negative influence of parents in the marital lives of their children; most especially ‘Mother in-laws’. Chances are that your mother in law has got some evil agendas and cannot keep away from her son but stick to your husband and family in the pretence that she is looking after her son and family.
It’s never the decision of your husband alone to say when his mother leaves but a decision for you two. Even the bible made us to understand that when two people come together in union they become one! So also is the saying that what God has joined together let no man put asunder!
I must tell you that even if you try to work it with your husband to get her out of your matrimonial home and don’t succeed; it’s not the end of the journey for you but a step closer to end of the road for your mother in- law. Now, I don’t mean what you may be thinking . I mean God will expose her intensions soon to your husband! The reason is this, your husband is the subject of the problem! Now, don’t blame your husband! Of course he is her son! But love him more for being your husband and for being part of his life.
Think, it in the way that God has brought you into his family to deliver him of his mother. Now, you will be wondering why I am saying this but there is always a beginning and end to a problem. But, as soon as God opens his eyes he will see that the mother is not all that righteous as he may think. No, sensible mother will want to come in between her son’s marital life even when it means that the son is married to the wrong woman as most people claim!
Also, make sure that you draw closer to God especially this time and pray against every strange woman in your marriage! God has joined you and husband together and no one will put asunder to it. Not, even now that a child is involved.
In a nutshell, please remain the good wife that you have always been and don’t make yourself a laughing stock by being who you are not! Show love to your mother in law still and sure be careful as you relate with her still. Bible says be wise as serpent! So be smart and know when to act. Ask God to direct your path and he will sure take control. God is watching and will sure put an end to your sorrows. I must say when you get your marriage back, don’t forget to share your experience with others to help them through when they fall in your situation. God will bless you as you do!
Take care of yourself and your family.
From someone who cares!
shine jean mobo
January 9, 2014 at 10:17 pmLuv her? Ur husband has alot to do here….she has to leave… Some ppl will tell u stay n endure? Ur hubby has to choose BTW u n her to be his wife….marriage is to be enjoyed not endured….Ur marriage is too young to face all dat
Blessing Aigbe
January 10, 2014 at 5:03 pmhave you giveing your marrage back to GOD?if not do that now,you see his give you your housbad and make 2 of you be one the same God is wating for you to plant your marriage in his name so that when ever the unwanted is comeing the name of jesus will defend you. do this and you will see the risult
ANSELEM AMAECHI
January 21, 2014 at 9:18 amMy dear u may say dat God has abandoned u but it is not true bcus d bible made us to know dat d tought he have us is for good not of evil,what am trying to tell u is dat for God to allow dis to be hapening in ur home is for a purppose bcus God works in a misterous way he allow dis problem to come in other to expose some hiden truth about d family u are married to,so my dear dnt pernick God is in control he wil make a name, u wil have ur family back,but u have to pray to God without season cry very loud to him and he wil surely see u through,scndly u have to talk to ur husband make him understand dat he have goten married and dat u as his wife has a right to some decision in d family and also make him understand dat u dnt hate his mother, as u do dat make sure u show ur husband more love dan before bcuse what d devil want is to put problem between u and ur husband. and dnt forget to hand ur family over to God let him rule over ur family and u wil surely get ur family back.
chi
March 1, 2014 at 11:07 pmTake ur problems to the Lord n leave it there, He will surely deliver u if u put ur trust in Him.
Take ur problems to d Lord n leave there!
God bless u.
thebestfriendsandfamilyconnection.com
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