The other day, I had a frank talk with some close friends of mine and we all agreed that most times, us women are our own worst enemies. Of course, not all women do these things, but really, we need to put a check on how we treat each other as women.
Here are some things I absolutely think women should stop doing to each other:
1. Stop Taking Each Other Down
If anyone should be there for a woman, it is another woman. As women, we need to stop taking each other down with our words and actions and rather focus on lifting each other up. The world would be a much better place if we all did that.
2. Stop Comparing
As women, we find it so easy to look at ourselves and compare varying qualities that other women possess. Each of us is created in our own unique and special way. Let us try taking the time to realize the unique qualities that each of us has rather than comparing.
3. Fighting Over Guys
Obviously, if your best girlfriend has an affair with your guy, you have every right to scream and yell. That kind of betrayal warrants anger, for sure. But most times, we should take our anger out on our partners rather than the other girl. Also, if your girlfriend is in a relationship and you are not, don’t allow your jealousy and frustration to get in the way of your friendship.
4. Criticizing Other People’s Weight
There are very polite ways to make a complement on another woman’s weight. But saying “oh my gosh you’re so skinny” or “wow, you’ve added so much weight!” might be more hurtful than we think it is.
5. Withholding Compliments
Not only is it bad to compliment someone negatively, it is also wrong to withhold good compliments. If your girlfriend has a really nice hairstyle on, or has lost some weight and is looking great, go ahead and say it to her.
6. Telling Each Other’s Secrets
It’s really sad to confide in someone and find out that the person has let out your secret to the wrong person. Ladies, let’s not do this to ourselves.
7. Not Being Supportive
Many times as women, we desert our friends when they need us the most. Its our friend’s wedding, birthday, graduation, store opening…. and because we feel a certain way about that achievement or milestone, we don’t give our support. So wrong.
8. Stop Competing!
I wish I could scream this. Not everything in life is a competition. No one has to really ‘win’ that best dressed award or most expensive bag title. Focus on your own qualities that are unique and special to you.
9. Comparing Our Bodies
Hey ladies, we really need to stop this. Many of us have done harmful things to our bodies in a bid to look like the next person. Love who you are and don’t think you need to look like anyone else.
10. Stop Hating
I really didn’t know what to title this last point. It might not be the appropriate word to use, but have you noticed that some women just don’t like other women for absolutely NO REASON? I’ve heard this a lot of times “I don’t like that lady” and when you ask why, the response is “I don’t know, I just don’t like her“. Maybe she walks or talks in a certain way that you don’t feel comfortable with and because of that, you conclude that you don’t like her even though you hardly know her!
This gets me confused. Let’s continue this discussion in the comment section. Ladies, why do you think we do this to each other? How can we stop such habits?
What other things do we need to stop doing to each other?
26 Comments
asumpta yar
February 21, 2015 at 1:06 pmWe should stop gossiping about other women’marriages and families.
cindy
February 21, 2015 at 1:16 pmYou were right on so many things but I strongly disagree with u on num 3 we all know men cheat and for that reason we naturally forgive them most times but with your friend that’s about the height why should I be yelling at the man when I know it’s part of their nature(not like am going to continue the relationship afterwards tho) but I think the friend is more shameful to have done that whatever happened to decency let’s forget the “we are friends ish” for now she’s more of a stabber in d circumstance i’ll take it out on my friend rather than a guy who’s probably not responsible enuf to kip his D in his pants, she should be the responsible one among dem. That’s all. #my opinion
Racheal Laye Edward
February 21, 2015 at 1:37 pmU are so correct!
Don’t know y we do it though.
prisca
February 21, 2015 at 2:09 pmSure ur ryt
Ekanem Charity
February 21, 2015 at 3:07 pmThis is true… tank you
Christiana
February 21, 2015 at 3:52 pmFirst of all, great job Stephanie for pointing out these issues & giving a solution too. Another thing I’ve noticed within my friends is that, one of them is going out with this guy & some of them are against it saying, “they think the boy loves her coz of her Dad’s wealth”. I asked these ladies if they have seen a particular thing about this guy that is making them say this & they said, “Nothing”. So ladies should please encourage our girlfriends on their relationship especially marriage. If you are absolutely sure and have seen, NOT HEARD O, that the guy is doing something bad, you could either go to him and talk to him to pls stop hurting UR friend or go to UR friend & calmly tell her to have a talk with her boyfriend/husband and take decisions herself. And let’s not forget to ALWAYS pray for each other. It’s the first backbone we could ever give to our friends. I LOVE BEING A WOMAN
chukwu amaka
February 21, 2015 at 4:14 pmYou ar so right,steph!!
lubandi barbara
February 21, 2015 at 4:20 pmWomen we should stop behaving like hypocrites, should stop back bitting
rosemaryboadu
February 21, 2015 at 4:40 pmDas true
Founje Emelda
February 21, 2015 at 8:15 pmI can say u have said all. Thanks very much for bringing out these points. These are things we do not knowing that it’s harmful to our fellow girls.i pray God help us all.
Alhaji Salifu Kargbo
February 21, 2015 at 10:21 pmwomen can easily gossip their religious mate especially church mate
Angela
February 22, 2015 at 3:48 pmWell written, I wish all women would read this. I do not know why they hate each other. I notice most ladies attitude towards me even when am just meeting them for the first time. Well I don’t bother I still walk with my head high. To stop the hate they need to love themselves and work on their self esteem
Frank Awusie
February 23, 2015 at 6:47 pmStef u r a genius
Helen A.
February 24, 2015 at 9:12 amThank u so much Steph,u have said it all yes its all so thru besides I jst want to add to d above did u know some of us women never sees anytin gud in their follow women? They feel wateva they do or think is d best any other person’s is inferior.we all should try and see d gud in each other.tnx.
praise
February 24, 2015 at 1:37 pmdoh not a lady, but dx are great points my dear. u are absolutely correct and the guys also need to be talked to.
10x
Austine mkpomgbiba
February 25, 2015 at 9:42 amThat is true my sister
Evergreenmaster
February 25, 2015 at 6:24 pmThk Stepha. for doing a gud job, God will help u to educate ur fellow women d more. These can not easly be found among we men, mark d word “easly” i.e not common
Lovette
February 26, 2015 at 2:54 pmWell said Steph, you are beautiful genius. I wish more ladies would read this too. They should also stop being two-faced and stop backstabbing/ backbiting too.
austin morah
February 26, 2015 at 7:50 pmHahahahahaha! Nice article from a nice woman, i hv bin waitng for dis. Women ngwa ”y”, answer! Or should i help u?
salomon musele
February 27, 2015 at 8:53 pmrien a dire!!!
ikeo
February 26, 2015 at 7:52 pmGreat job Stephanie keep it up
Ernest Anayo
February 27, 2015 at 10:42 amAm sorry to be hear,to spike in the women’s wall but l want to comment on wat the other person said consigning number 3 that some of our guys cheat on you girls, let me say this some do cheat on their lover with reason but some of us who do not think the negative and positive of cheating on the other do give us bad names, but we guys I must say that it is so regrettably so lugubrious to said that we have a girlfriend a girl that we know how much we suffer before we be able to convince her to be our lover all of a sudden we live her cheat on her for no reasons,some of us do say she is an old faction but why let’s stop it is not good ,and my sister that said that guys do betray l want you to know that some things happen because of some tin that happened,if you girls are like us and you have a girlfriend who always gives you problem and a girl that likely to fellow you with ferocity and fiery who always close the doors of happiness that comes from her because of you and you see the one that open through the other girl hmm,l want you people to think about this and give me an answer,tell wat will you do.
Ernest Anayo
February 27, 2015 at 10:47 amThanks Stephanie
ONYEGBULE SOLOMON
March 1, 2015 at 9:06 ami truelly love your write ups,they are awesome.thanks alot and we still need more from you.
Mookho
March 9, 2015 at 10:13 pmvery true
Thomas Elizabeth
April 13, 2015 at 7:08 pmI honestly think that a female friend who knowingly goes into a relationship with her bestfriend’s man cannot be trusted, and you have every right to do away with such friend. The blame should be on both parties, none should be excluded from liability; this is bcos they have both committed one and the same offence and they both had your trust, so I believe it’s the same; the only difference perhaps is that the relationship might never work out again which makes it more difficult on the guy. Everyone of us should restrain from such habits. For heaven’s sake there are so many fishes in the ocean, just pray to God to give you your own and be happy for others when good things happen to them, good things will come to you too.