Blog Talk to Steph

His lies broke my heart!

I have been dating a guy for 4 years. When we met he didn’t have a job, he didn’t have any real focus in life. As a Christian, I gave him hope, I loved him and helped him through those tough moments in his life when he was confused and hopeless. There were many times I gave him money to do things and I never asked to be refunded because I felt he was my friend and partner. Finally, with help and prayers and financial/emotional support from me and my family, he got a job and was able to decide the path his life should take. He always seemed genuinely grateful for all I did for him. But after 4 years together I discovered it was all a lie! I found out this man who had sworn to love only me, this man who had confessed he would never leave me, was actually dating someone else even longer than me (they’ve been dating for over 8 years), and they have a 7 year old son together! I learnt that he was so frustrated by the relationship initially that was why he left her in the East and came to Lagos to sort himself out – all of this information just came out a few months back when one of his relatives was burdened with guilt and decided to tell me the truth. Now that he is sorted with a good job, he has sent for this woman and their son (they are not legally married) to join him in Lagos and has refused to pick my calls. I gave 4years, lots of money and all my emotions and love into this relationship. The problem now is, I am pregnant (I have irregular menstrual period so I didn’t know until it was 3months) and when I told him, he just said if I want to have the baby I can have it, without any feelings or care. Was it wrong to have loved this man? I feel so hurt! I know people will just say I should move on and start all over again with my unborn child, but is it easy? Why do people hurt other people so badly?! – Ifeoma

My people, Ifeoma needs some comforting words and some advice. Please your comments might help her through this very confusing and hurtful phase. Thank you all!

–          Stephanie

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