Blog Talk to Steph

Love Is A Decision..

Happy Friday! This meaningful post was going round so thought to share with my SL Fabz also. Culled from FB Page – ‘Hit Like If Agreed’ —

During a seminar, a woman asked,” How do I know if I am with the right person?”The author then noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so he said, “It depends. Is that your partner?” In all seriousness, she answered “How do you know?” Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it’s weighing on your mind replied the author.Here’s the answer.Every relationship has a cycle… In the beginning; you fall in love with your partner. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies. Falling in love wasn’t hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn’t have to DO anything. That’s why it’s called “falling” in love.

People in love sometimes say, “I was swept of my feet.”Picture the expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something happened TO YOU.Falling in love is a passive and spontaneous experience. But after a few months or years of being together, the euphoria of love fades. It’s a natural cycle of EVERY relationship.

Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse’s idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship; you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage.At this point, you and/or your partner might start asking, “Am I with the right person?” And as you reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else. This is when relationships breakdown.The key to succeeding in a relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the person you found. People blame their partners for their unhappiness and look outside for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes.

Infidelity is the most common. But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your relationship. It lies within it.I’m not saying that you couldn’t fall in love with someone else. You could. And TEMPORARILY you’d feel better. But you’d be in the same situation a few years later.

Because (listen carefully to this):

The key to succeeding in a Relationship is not finding the right person; it’s learning to love the Person you found.SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. You have to work on it day in and day out. It takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it demands WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make it work. Make no mistake about it.Love is NOT a mystery. There are specific things you can do (with or without your partner), Just as there are physical laws Of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. If you know how to apply these laws, the results are predictable.

Love is therefore a “decision”. Not just a feeling.

Remember this always: God determines who walks into your life. It is up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let GO! 

Have a lovely weekend.




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  • Reply
    Vivian Wilson
    April 12, 2013 at 4:35 am

    This is definitely a food for thought. This is a ray of Light that has been shed into a huge hall of darkness and it is indeed worth studying and knowing! Thanx for dis enlightenment….. Keep enriching us!

  • Reply
    Oluwatuyi Temitope
    April 12, 2013 at 4:37 am

    IS Ω̴ BIG TRUE !

  • Reply
    jepsalm manuel
    April 12, 2013 at 5:12 am

    Luv is a fun thing{ it doesn’t ask why}

  • Reply
    April 12, 2013 at 6:05 am

    Wow this is ĴU̶̲̥̅̊S̶̲̥̅̊T̶̲̥̅̊ 4 me!!! Thanks somuch!!

  • Reply
    ibe augusta
    April 12, 2013 at 6:32 am

    Trully, love is a decision basically coming from within the heart, moving initially from being passive by falling in love, to being active by staying in love…

  • Reply
    April 12, 2013 at 6:53 am

    Hmmmm. Thought provokin

  • Reply
    April 12, 2013 at 7:41 am

    I agree with that saying,learn to love the person you found than saying u are looking for the right person because love is a give and take thing ,know what ur partner likes,and he knows urs too ,understand each other in everything ,it make s your love to grow high

  • Reply
    April 12, 2013 at 8:57 am

    Wow A̶̲̥̅♏ glad ℓ̊ hav some one with dis same view of love been a decision we make not what we fell,steph dat was exactly What we debated on in my church on VAL ÐД¥.thanks for sharing dis with d world

  • Reply
    ojoko juliet
    April 12, 2013 at 10:01 am

    This is nice.

  • Reply
    April 13, 2013 at 3:02 pm

    Nice one! But i dont totally agree. Ever falling in luv and married a physco? All u need do is brkaway…. %.

  • Reply
    April 15, 2013 at 7:56 pm

    I looooooooove this article!!!keep more of it comin!

  • Reply
    April 21, 2013 at 8:15 am

    It is as much a decision as it is a feeling…

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